Proof God Exists

I guess god does exist. Here is proof. Lots of it.

A few of my favorites…

18. PARENTAL ARGUMENT
(1) My mommy and daddy told me that God exists.
(2) Therefore, God exists.

19. ARGUMENT FROM NUMBERS
(1) Millions and millions of people believe in God.
(2) They can’t all be wrong, can they?
(3) Therefore, God exists.

36. ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPLETE DEVASTATION
(1) A plane crashed killing 143 passengers and crew.
(2) But one child survived with only third-degree burns.
(3) Therefore, God exists.

55. ARGUMENT FROM BIOGENESIS
(1) Where did Adam come from, dummy?
(2) Therefore, God exists.

58. ARGUMENT FROM ARGUMENTATION
(1) God exists.
(2) [Atheist’s counterargument]
(3) Yes he does.
(4) [Atheist’s counterargument]
(5) Yes he does!
(6) [Atheist’s counterargument]
(7) YES HE DOES!!!
(8) [Atheist gives up and goes home.]
(9) Therefore, God exists.

59. ARGUMENT FROM CREATIVE INTERPRETATION
(1) God is:
(a) The feeling you have when you look at a newborn baby.
(b) The love of a mother for her child.
(c) That little still voice in your heart.
(d) Humankind’s potential to overcome their difficulties.
(e) How I feel when I look at a sunset.
(f) The taste of ice cream on a hot day.
(2) Therefore, God exists.

79. ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL SANITY
(1) I’ve had religious experiences that can’t be explained unless I’m insane or God exists.
(2) Therefore, God exists.

109. ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF DISPROOF
(1) You can’t prove God doesn’t exist!
(2) Therefore, God exists.

110. ARGUMENT FROM ANECDOTAL EXPERIENCE (I)
(1) I once experienced something I can’t explain.
(2) [Atheists offer several possible, natural explanations.]
(3) You’re just guessing! I was there.
(4) Therefore, God exists.

117. ARGUMENT FROM PREFERRED ANCESTRY
(1) I don’t want to be related to monkeys.
(2) Therefore, God exists.

197. ARGUMENT FROM SCIENTISTS
(1) Some famous scientists believed in God.
(2) Therefore, God exists.

228. ARGUMENT FROM THE BIBLE (II)
(1) The Bible says the Bible is true.
(2) Therefore the Bible is true.
(3) The Bible says God exists.
(4) Therefore, God exist.

These are funny. Have a scroll through the rest. What is really sad is that I’ve heard many of these posited as serious proofs.

2 Comment

  1. I’ve got one:

    (1) Brent says God doesn’t exist
    (2) Brent is an argumentative a**hole
    (3) Therefore, God exists

    :-)

  2. Jason Gendron says: Reply

    Good one!

    :-)

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